The Unfinished Journey

Melancholy daydreams fill my head.
Sadness builds within.
My mind races with mixed emotions.
Desperation enters my soul.

This reality I am living, a reality of hopelessness, fills my every move.
I am traveling on a dead end road wondering if I will find the right path.
Not knowing what lies ahead created an unbearable fear.
A fear that I may not be able to overcome.

How can I overcome this desperation, this hopelessness?
How can I find the right path when melancholy thoughts block the way?
How can I reach the point of happiness when all I know is sadness?

Searching for the way out of desperation, out of sadness, I see a light of hope ahead.
Is this my goal or another obstacle in my path?
Is this the way out or just a mirage?

I read the signs, I hear the laughter, and I see the happiness.
But is that the place for me?
Am I destined for this melancholy state where desperation and sadness rule?

I travel the long, treaded path seeing signs of relief,
Signs of other journeys that have taken place,
Signs of other people finding happiness.
But will I find mine?
I will see…

©Sam Neal

Waiting

As the sun sets on the horizon,
Another day is over.
Another day through with facing my fears, my inhibitions, my weaknesses.
Another day complete with living my life for others, living my life to please.

When will the day come when I have conquered my fears?
When will it occur when I have overcome my inhibitions, and put aside my weaknesses.
I am waiting for the day to come that I can say I am living for me.
Waiting for the setting of the sun, the day to be over, that I will be me.

© Sam Neal

On the Outside

A cloudless sky fills my view of the world beyond my window.
A cool breeze is felt by the trees that surround my house.
A new beginning for the nest of birds.
But what awaits me on the outside.

A soaring hawk floats through the sky as a small white cloud appears.
The blowing leaves seem to dance on the limbs.
The momma bird feeds her young.
But what awaits me on the outside.

Time and again I sit and view the surroundings from the small window,
Wondering whether I should venture out.
But I am held back by the fear of
What awaits ME on the outside?

© Sam Neal

Answers

As the wind blows on this summer afternoon

I sit and contemplate my mere existence

Why am I here? What is my purpose? Why should I care?

At times I feel that I stick out in a crowd,

But others I am like a small ant in a large field.

I need answers.

To some, I am here to get a better understanding of my surroundings; my purpose, helping others.

Some say I care too much; others, not enough.

I need answers.

As the clouds roll across the blue sky, as the wind blows my hair.

I sit and wonder, Is there anyone out there that could give me answers, answers I can believe in, answers that matter?

As I light my last cigarette, I realize the only answers that truly matter are the ones I myself believe.

© Sam Neal

Sharing my Poetry

I've been writing poetry over the years and wanted to share. Let me know what you think.